Colin Montgomerie – talks James Bond, Sean Connery & Goldfinger

BOND & GOLF, THE FULL MONTY

Hey everyone, Colin Montgomerie here. When I’m not on the golf course or polishing my OBE, I’m always thinking about how golf and Bond intersect. Whether its Odd Job crushing golf balls or Bond getting kidnapped by Draco’s men on his way to play golf in OHMSS, I literally think of nothing else.

You could say I’m more a Honey Ryder than a Ryder Cup kinda guy. So today I’m  here to field your questions about Bond and golf, as I’m retired, and frankly a bit bored.

Colin, did you ever get to play with the legend Sean Connery?

I did a few times. There’s a lot being made of the story of me being starstruck when I played with Sean. The papers made me out to be some kind of sycophant. But in truth it was Sean who was in awe of me!

Sure he was a fair-to-middling Bond, but let’s face it, he hasn’t won a record eight European Tour Order of Merit titles, including a streak of seven consecutive from 1993 to 1999 now has he? He also mentioned my Scottish accent was much better than his. Gary Sinise was there, he heard it too.

Colin have you ever had to play a round of golf for a bar of gold? 

I remember Nick Faldo getting quite excited finding a bar of Nazi Gold in the bunker down at Stoke Poges. Thinking he’d made his fortune, he called his wife telling her he wanted a divorce and was off to Thailand to find some LadyBoys.

Of course, Cash Converters told him it was a fake bar, possibly the prop from the movie Goldfinger. Great news for the EON archivists, bad news for Nick.

Colin are you ever worried about those alligators you see on the golf courses in Florida?

I remember my first caddy at the Zurich Classic in Louisiana attempted to jump across the alligators to get to the 15th Green. But unlike Bond in Live and Let Die, they caught him and ripped him to ribbons. It was a horrific disaster and to add insult to injury I had to carry my own clubs for the last three holes.

But the perils us golfers have to face are endless. There are lightning strikes, you can get Golfer’s Elbow, and the stinging nettles in the rough at Loch Lomond are f*cking vicious.

Hi Colin is it true Connery picked up his love for golfing after those scenes in Goldfinger? 

Many people think that, but it simply isn’t true. In fact it was only when I took him down to Great Yarmouth on a jolly we chanced across a crazy golf course.

I knew how much it meant to him, playing me, his idol. So I let him win. He got a bit bigheaded though so years later I brought him down a peg or two at a charity golf event at St Andrews.

I told him he should tuck his socks into his trousers and wear his flat cap backwards. Of course St Andrews has a ‘no twats’ policy and Sir Sean was thrown off the course. Strict rules of golf indeed.